Discover How to Identify Your Core Desire by Jack Zufelt

Jack ZufeltWhen you become aware of the root of achievement, every door you wish to go through will open wide.  When you become aware of the root of achievement, every door you wish to go through will open wide. It truly is the key to success. Whether you use it to open the door or not is your choice, something you have total control over. Whether you choose to open the door or not depends solely on your heart-set, not your mind-set. Core Desires are those things you have your heart set on- what you want to be, have, or do most. One might think that identifying these Core Desires would be easy, but people often tell me, “I don’t know what I want, please help me.” This dilemma affects people of all age groups and crosses all political, social, and economic lines. People tell me that they don’t know what they want to be, have, or do when they “grow up.” They are still searching. NULL

NO SENSE OF OBLIGATION Core Desires aren’t objectives imposed on you by others. They aren’t “shoulds” or “ought-tos.” Core Desires are those things you want with all your heart. They are deep, intense, and powerful longings. They are persistent, ever-demanding, heartfelt hungers or yearnings that pierce you to the very core. One easy way to identify them is that they are always tied to a strong emotion in your heart- which is the reason anything in your life gets done at a high level of success, satisfaction, and fun.

The Conquering Force is the only force strong enough to sustain the persistent effort and focus necessary to realize your Core Desires.

However, people often do things because they feel they have to, ought to, or should, not because they truly want to. It could be because they feel a duty or obligation or because they fear punishment, ostracism, or disapproval. Your life is too precious, and your sojourn here on earth too short, to waste your time and effort on things that are not rewarding and fulfilling. Yes, at times you must “do your duty” with family, friends, employers, and country- but duty is pleasure when it aligns with desire. We will always encounter some “have-tos” on our way to our “want-tos”-our Core Desires. That’s a fact. Some duties may be unpleasant, difficult, expensive, or even painful. But you won’t mind doing them if you are getting where you want to go. If your heart is set on getting a college degree, you will have to take some courses you don’t like. If you want to get into shape, you will have to exercise. If you want to lose weight, you will have to change your diet. If you want to own your own business, you will have to take certain risks. However, you won’t mind the “have-tos” while pursuing your Core Desires because the rewards far exceed the price to be paid. When the “have-tos” aren’t getting you to your Core Desires, your life is less fulfilling. It may even be miserable.

Only when you are pursuing your Core Desires- those things that inspire you and bring you joy- will you unleash the powerful Conquering Force within you.

You will experience profound joy, peace, balance, serenity, and happiness. As you pursue the desires of your heart, you will be happier. What makes work work? When you don’t like it. When you love doing something, even if it is physically or emotionally demanding, you don’t mind the effort required; in fact, you may call it fun. To experience a life full of enjoyable activities, day in and day out, you must know what you really desire. If you think you want something, but deep down at the core that’s not really what you want, you will never attain it. WHAT DOES YOUR HEART DESIRE? Do you know what you desire most in your heart? Do you have a sense of what it will take to realize those desires? Are you willing to pay the price? For example, suppose you want to become a certified public accountant. You know that you need to complete a course of study as well as pass certain tests to realize this desire. Now you need to ask, “Am I smart enough to learn what I need to know? Do I believe that the knowledge I need already exists somewhere in a class, a course, a book, a seminar, a mentor, or on the Internet?” If you answer these questions with a confident yes, you clearly have the ability to achieve your desire to become a CPA. Next, you will need to put your ability to learn anything together with the information that already exists. The catalyst for all this comes from your Core Desires. If you have had a goal for months or years and haven’t learned what it takes to make it happen-let alone started working toward it- it is not a Core Desire. Drilling down to your Core Desires and exposing them to the light of day can be, at least until you get the hang of it, a little difficult and emotionally frustrating because you are not used to dealing with your feelings at the core level.

So I have designed a measurement device to help you identify your Core Desires. This simple assessment tool serves as a guide to finding and knowing your heart’s desires- it causes you to reflect on everything you would like to have, do, experience, become, or achieve in many areas of your life.

To help you assess the relative intensity of those desires, I have also designed the Core Desire Scale. A GAME OF QUESTIONS Identifying your Core Desires can be as easy as honestly answering these two Core Desire Search Questions: What would I like to have that I don’t have now? You might ask this question to help you uncover your Core Desires in different areas of your life, such as family relationships, finances, self-image, social relationships, mental self, and spiritual self. This list isn’t all-inclusive, but it illustrates areas in which identifying your Core Desires could prove beneficial. With this central question in mind, try answering these questions to learn what you truly desire most: What would I love to do if I had no obligations? If only I had more time? What makes me very happy? What makes me laugh? What tugs at my heart or stirs my emotions? What am I pining away for? What would I love to do to help others? What characteristics would I like to have or strengthen? What do I want with or from my spouse and children? What do I want with or from others? What do my best friend and I do for fun? What did I used to do that I just can’t do now? If I didn’t have to worry about money, what would I do?

Each of these questions will elicit strong responses- but not all of them are Core Desires. Ask this next question about each desire you have just identified to narrow the field:

If I had that, was that, or could do that, what would it give me and how would it make me feel? Asking this second question helps you get past superficial wants and wishes and helps you see what difference this desire, once fulfilled, might make in your life. But your search is not over; you must now measure the strength of these desires. THE CORE DESIRE SCALE You must be very sensitive to the intensity of your emotional responses to each of the Search Questions. This sensitivity will help you accurately measure the intensity of your desires. Intensity is everything as it relates to the achievement of your Core Desires. What a difference a degree or two of intensity can make in the results you achieve for your efforts! If you want to cook some vegetables or power a steam locomotive, you must heat the water to 212F to make the water boil-211F is very close, but it won’t do. Only when the temperature reaches 212F will the water begin to boil, bringing the results you want. If the temperature is between 95F and 106F, then the water is only lukewarm. The seismograph, or Richter scale, measures the magnitude of an earthquake. The scale measures magnitudes of 0 to 10. Why is the difference between earthquakes measuring 5 and 7 on the Richter scale so dramatic? Because each number on the scale represents an earthquake ten times stronger than the number just beneath it. An earthquake registering a 7 on the Richter scale
is ten times more powerful and ten times more destructive than one registering a 6. Imagine the power of the most powerful earthquake ever recorded- an 8.9 on the scale. Just as the Richter scale measures an earthquake’s intensity, so must you assess the intensity of your desires, feelings, and emotions by using the Core Desire Scale, which has a range from 1 to 100: 1 to 20: whims, passing fancies, wishes, gratifications, momentary pleasures, and dislikes 20 to 40: shoulds, oughts, duties, obligations, assignments, and extrinsic motivation 40 to 60: moderate-intensity desires, wants, interests, and needs 60 to 80: recurring desires, growing intensity, strong mind-sets, and a sense of duty


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Jack Zufelt
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