The most powerful way to influence and persuade is to know what they are thinking, how they are feeling, what they want and what problems they want solved, in the area of your expertise. I once heard the famous sales trainer Tom Hopkins say “People don’t like to be sold, but they do like to buy.” How do you invite someone to happily buy from you? How do you guarantee the sale?
The best way to have someone trust you enough to buy from you or join your team is to “gently enter the conversation that is already going on in their head.”
There are many sales skills and manipulation techniques that people use to develop rapport with prospects on a surface level but the most powerful way to influence and persuade is to know what they are thinking, how they are feeling, what they want and what problems they want solved, in the area of your expertise. NULL
Unless you are a mind reader, the best way to do this is by asking open ended empowering… leading questions. Recently I was conducting a coaching session with a client and she said… “I was asking all sorts of open ended questions but they never asked me what I did!” Although this leads to rapport building and pleasant conversation, in order to influence in the direction you wish to go, the specific open ended questions would be to find out where they wish to improve their life and towards the benefits and features of your product, your service and your “why.”
People have an inherent desire to believe that the product they are buying will do what it promises and if you can find out, what they want and show your product will accomplish that end result, your prospects will convince themselves that they need your service.
And if you have influenced them well, they will become “raving fans” and convince others to use your services. The main difference between Persuasion and Manipulation is: Persuasion:
- Will always leave people wanting more, because you are going with the persons inherent desires.
- Using persuasion you will not have to close a sale because the only logical and emotional conclusion is to do business with you.
- Is inviting and leads to long term results by creating win /win scenarios.
- Is a conscious activity as it involves a purposeful intent. You are thinking ahead of time and applying a certain set of techniques to get a specific result that is of true benefit to the prospect.
Manipulation:
- To control or influence (a person or situation) cleverly, unfairly, or unscrupulously.
- Can work very well in the short term… but gets caught out and will always be found out.
- Techniques are – Guilt, fear, intimidation, ego attack, regret, forcing a desire to be liked or loved and lies.
How does it feel when some “know it all” tells you what you should do? Or some “con man pulls the wool over your eyes?” You may feel energetically and emotionally drained, used or even violated.
If you truly want to succeed in any area of business and life, the best way is to create true “win win” situations for all the people involved, by using the principles and the art of persuasion.
“Persuasion can open any door… to put you in the kind of situations you want to be in as a business person.”– David Lakhani. © 2010 All rights reserved.
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A certified NLP (neuro linguistic programming) facilitator & trainer, a certified transformational life and career coach, a Master Practitioner in energy leadership and published author with Dr. Wayne Dyer, Anthony Robbins, and Dr. Michael Beckwith in “Living in Abundance” and with Dr. Towanna Freeman in “Purposeful Action - 7 Steps to Fulfillment.” (available at www.amazon.com) Trained in Mind Power, Barbara is a leading authority on Vision Boards, success and goal achievement.
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